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Friday. 5.16.08 12:23 am
ok it's been almost a month since I last post an entry
Despite playing online game, still i cannot relieve the stress out of my weeny brain.. "i can't possibly squeeze all the information studies in just a short period of time." My exam flunk incrediblely and I know this is the wake up call. ok i had enough of this shitted results. No more! but how? This coming june holiday i am going to be studying intensively be it anywhere. i know this seems incredulous for my family but at least give me support as to motivates me. I doubt that will not happen. This year marks my 18 years of living on milky earth which proves that i am on my own, the decisions that i will decide that will bear a big responsiblity in each individual choice i make. The obtsacles will lead you be greater height and i mean being a strenuous person who knows no fear. Leading a indomitable spirit despite failure at different challenges will help you nurture a good adult. That what life is! Strive Hard!!

ok. lets change topic. The last few days i noticed a lot of the unfortunates. Everytime i see this people, I feel so so sorry for them, and I do not mean the word pity. Pity will never be in my dictonary as i feel it is a form of insult to a person who is weaker or unfortunate than you.
Back to my younger days in the elementary schooling, i had a lot of bad memories. One of my memories maybe the greatest joke of your life. Let me briefly explain what happened during that time. It was my third year in elementary school and i had been obsessed with pokemon cards. lol Since then, every week i will buy dex of cards to satisfy my card collection. The feeling was cannot be explained by words. I surmise this feeling will be no difference from a otaku who is craving for his or her anime figuring collection. ok thats enough of that. Back to what i want to talk about the incident. I can still remember vivdly. There was this particularly one girl which you can tell by her 5 senses that she is mentally retarded. EH! i do not come from a disable school so please do not make wild guesses. Err you know that time i was still young and i thought this people are funny and teasable. My classmates and i laugh at her everytime she was scolded by teacher doing silly things. At that time i was talkative during lesson time and i soon caught redhanded of talking loudly to my classmate who is sitting quite far from my seat. I was force to sit infront by my maths teacher. Back then my class sitting arrangement was two by two horizontally straight rows so every students will have a partner. Guess who is sitting beside me? THE M.R GIRL!! This is the worst nightmare ever. Immediately, I shift my desk one metre away from her everytime after my maths lesson is over. By nature, yes I wad tease by my classmates. Hell, how long am i going to be trap in the fear of the wilderness?! My spirit is suffocating! ok let me ask you a silly question, is liquid glue a fun substance to play with? Usually we use it to paste things up. To her it was her best enjoyment
ever in her life. she took the liquid glue pour it on to her bare hands and rubbed it together. I was dumbfounded and speechless. The glue even fortuitously drip on to her uniform. You can imagine how dirty is her by the appearance. You will never beileve what she said.. "mmm.... wo ai ni!!" meaning I love you. She said it everytime she was playing with the glue. My classmates then told her to said it to me. Without a doubt, she said it. Immediately, my legs pull me away from my chair, running away. Yes, she was chasing after me screaming the mushy three words. Help! This is worse than a person who take a barang knife and chase after you. If a pretty girl do that, i would not mind her doing that.
Until now the girl's actions still prey my mind. GOOSEBUMPS!!
Ya, LAUGH all you want.
Throughout my life i am really grateful to my God for taking care of me this past 18 years. If not i may become one of the mentally disabled. Why do i say that? ok when i was junior highschool year one I had caught up with a cold which leads to fever. Usually that period of time marks the male puberty period so fever is common. However this is different. My heat caught up at 40.5 degree. The doctor was quite stunned and he secretly told my mum that if this will to be getting bad to worse, my brain cells will eventually be burned. Thus. i will result in no difference from a mentally disabled person. There was a frightening incident during that time. Sleepwalking. Normally sleepwalking happens to a person who is extremely tired but it happen to me not because of this particular reason but it the high temperature that cause it. This happened in the afternoon when i wad taking a nap in my parents's master bed. Strangely, this is what my brother and mother said to me when i am sleeping walking. I ran to the kitchen, staring at my brother who is eating his lunch and I went back to bed. Next I went to the second stroll back to the kitchen and this time the kitchen toilet. I went to the toilet and pointed to the cubicle hole saying "EEEEEKKK!!! IT'S DIRTY IT'S DIRTY!!." I almost touch the 'water'. My expression that my mum describe was in the way that i was very agitated. My brother quickly pulled me out of the toilet. He then shook me saying "are you ok!? You know who am I." Then i regained my unconsiousness. This does not happen one time but also the second time. During thursday, my parents went to church and told the people there about my condition and they will very worried for me. Hence they pray intensively during that night at church for my recovery. Praise the Lord for answering their prayers. I can ever repay such great benevolence of the church people and my families.

Epochally, I felt that the unfortunate are people who we need to be caring and respectful towards them and not ridicule because of their appearance and actions. Some were born out to be like that and some happened to be literally ill that result to be mentally disabled.
But what piqued my curiosity is what and why cause this things happen? Is it mainly God's punishment towards the people because of their evil deeds or the offspring of the parents?


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